Clearing the Fog

Why is there a fear of the past?

You lived it…

You survived it…

So – Learn from it.

Own it – because it is part of what made you who you are!

Then… you can tell your story as only you can tell it.  Enlighten the world and make it a better place. In freeing yourself you end up giving others the courage to take that first step, own their past and begin living in the present and for their future.

So many people are walking around in the fog of their past. Not living in the present because the past is so heavy on their shoulders. Cast it off! Be done with it because your past does not control you! Do not allow anything negative that has happened to you dictate who you are! Your life is YOURS… walk in the glory of who you are!! You are a one of a kind, unique creation of God! 

My husband keeps our house on 69 degrees in the summertime. When I walk outside my sunglasses immediately get foggy because of the temperature and humidity change. It is so bad I have to take them off and let them warm up and clear them before I can see! This is what I think living in the pain of the past must be like… walking  out of the cold dark house into the sunshine and not being able to see! In order to walk and move forward I have to clean my lenses!

The beauty of the world is all around us. When you free your soul from hell and torment you will be able to see and appreciate all the beauty surrounding you. From the lady bug in the grass to a magnificent sunset, you will see things much clearer and with a new appreciation for life.

So, here is to walking into the sunshine, cleaning the lenses of our soul so we can appreciate what is in front of us and move forward. 

Hurt

I read a friend’s blog today and she had one sentence that literally jumped out and figuratively slapped me across the room.

Hurting people hurt people.

So simple… yet says so much! How true is this statement???

Just reading this sentence boggles my mind. I think about the initial hurt, the hurt that is inflicted on someone else because of that initial hurt… and the snowball effect it has on an infinite number of people. How one hurts ripple can affect so many and what it takes to break that cycle.

 

Be mindful of your words. And sometimes it isn’t what you say but how you say it- so be mindful of your tone as well. What may not seem hurtful to you may be received as hurtful by someone else… and the ripple begins.   

It doesn’t cost anything to be kind.

Mental Draino

You know, ….  I don’t know.

A friend of mine has been battling anxiety, depression and a whole plethora of other things that she finally found out , almost by accident, was due to an over active thyroid.

I wish it was that simple for me. My mind is very heavy these days. Not exactly sure why. It’s almost as if there is so much in there that it feels like a clogged drain. No flow out, just stopped up. I need some draino.

What exactly is the psychological form of draino? I always thought if I could journal everything I would feel better but it appears that I have started something I can’t keep up with. Things are coming at me in my mind at such a rapid fire speed I feel the only thing I can do to keep me from going completely nutso is shut it down.

What will that accomplish? Shutting the flow of thought down so that it clogs up my mind and boggles down my entire mental state. My head feels like the hoover dam. Holding back all that water and only allowing a trickle here and there to keep the power behind the dam in check so it doesn’t blow.

Finding the balance. My friend calls it “grace” that finds you and pulls you through the dark spots into the light so you can see and feel the joy around you. I think my “grace” comes to me in the morning. When I am the first one to get up and start waking everyone else up. My joy is in the faces of my children when they are just waking up and they have that faintest hint of a smile on their face. After they are headed down the driveway I get about 15 minutes to sit with a little something to eat and a cup of coffee before I have to get myself together. That is my happy time - in the morning, I have a similar time in the evening when we are all winding the day down. Putting the 6 year old to bed and reading books, getting the 14 year old showered and hanging out with her and the hubby in the living room before calling it a night.

I am the first one up… and the last one to bed. Every day. It is the beginning and the end of those days that I find that clarity and joy. Everything in between is a mess. That is what I need the help with … the mess in between.

I am going to see a professional that also specializes in hypnotism. Hoping she can clear the fogginess for me or at least show me how to clear it myself.  She will be my mental draino. She may teach me how to meditate or some other technique to help keep the clogged drains at bay. I don’t know what she is going to do but I am ready. 

I have come to the realization that there are times in life that outside help may be necessary to help get clarity and feel whole again. I think I need to just talk about things that I have never even spoken of out loud. Someone who doesn’t know me - just to listen to me completely DUMP out everything that is clogging my mind! I know part of this is probably brought on my hormone changes and other life/body changes that are inevitable for any woman. So, putting my big girl panties on… off I go!

The Thriller/ Mystery Beach Reads List

 OK – I did a list of chick lit for the summer. I can only take so much of that. I have to break it up with an occasional thriller. So here is my list of mystery/thrillers for the summer. I plan on reading more of these J They make great beach reads too! If you are looking for a nail biter this list is a good place to start!.

1 –       Blood Infernal – James Rollins

            This is the third (and I think final) installment of the Order of the Sanguines

            Series. I love this series.. little bit DaVinci Code, little bit of adventure.

2-        The Presidents Shadow – Brad Meltzer

            I love this guy! His books are wonderful. This is the third in the Culpeper Ring

            Series. They don’t have to be read in order – which is good because I haven’t read

            the second one.

3 -       Bone Labyrinth – James Rollins

            Another from one of my favorite authors… this is the latest installment of his

            Sigma Force series. Ahhh… Painter Crowe…

4 -       Crimson Shore – Douglas Preston & Lincoln Child

            I know this damn book doesn’t come out until November but I can’t hardly wait.

            This is the latest in the Agent Pendergast series. These books suck me in and I

            Can imagine myself tagging along with him!

(This is my next career... mobile beach reads)

5 -        The Girl on the Train – Paula Hawkins

            I actually just finished this one. This is a stand alone book with many twists and turns. Took               me about 100 pages to get my mind around the jumping back and forth present day to past.                 Once I got used to it the book was really good.

6-        The Girl in the Spiders Web - David Lagercrantz (Stieg Larsson)

            4^th installment in the Lisbeth Salander and Mikael Blomkvist series. While the

            Original author of the series has passed away I am eager to read the continuation

            Of their story.

7 -        Pretty Girls –Karin Slaughter

            This is not a series book. I love her two series (Grant County and Will Trent) and        

            Wish she would write another but I am eager to get this one in my hands. It

            Comes out September 29^th but is worth mentioning because I just love her        

            Books!

8 -       The Forgotten Room – Lincoln Child

            Reading this one now. Because I love their collaborations, I also love their solo

            Books! Lincoln Child – of the Douglas Preston & Lincoln Child (Agent Pendergast)                     books, is a fantastic thriller writer… I always read his solo books!

9 -       The Great Zoo of China – Matthew Reilly

            In the tradition of Jurassic Park, this book will be non stop action as all Reilly’s books are! I               do wish he would write another Jack West because I literally could not put them down!

10 -     The Patriot Threat – Steve Berry

            Another Cotton Malone series book… I do love these thrill rides mixed with

            Historical mystery!